Yo mama so short she does backflips under the bed.

Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said “Sorry, no professionals.”

Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.

Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said “What a treasure!” and her father said “Yes, let’s go bury it.”

Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

Yo mama so ugly they didn’t give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.

Yo mama so old her social security number is 1!

Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck

Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class.

Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.

Yo mama so old she has a picture of Moses in her yearbook.