When does a person decide to become an accountant?When he realises he doesn’t have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

Why did God invent economists?So accountants could have someone to laugh at.

What’s an actuary?An accountant without the sense of humour.

Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries?They find bookkeeping too exciting.

What do actuaries do to liven up their office party?Invite an accountant.

What does an accountant use for birth control?His personality.

What’s an extroverted accountant?One who looks at your shoes while he’s talking to you instead of his own.

What do you call an accountant who is seen talking to someone?Popular

What’s the definition of unlikely?A photo-spread in Playboy titled ‘The World’s Top Accountants – Nude!’.

What’s an accountant’s idea of trashing his hotel room?Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.