Funny Car and train jokes - Page 5

Car and train jokes

A Roadway driver is driving ea…

7 Sep , 2009  

A Roadway driver is driving east on Route 66 he sees a truck driving west and the CB crackles to life . “Hey Roadway driver whos the two biggest poofs in America?” comes from the CB.The Roadway driver replies . “I don’t know” .The other trucker says ” You and your brother “.Well the Roadway […]

Car and train jokes

I was going 70 miles an hour a…

7 Sep , 2009  

I was going 70 miles an hour and got stopped by a cop who said, -Do you know the speed limit is 55 miles per hour?- -Yes, officer, but I wasn’t going to be out that long.-

Car and train jokes

When I get real bored, I like …

7 Sep , 2009  

When I get real bored, I like to drive down town and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I’m leaving.

Car and train jokes

Jill’s car was unreliable and …

7 Sep , 2009  

Jill’s car was unreliable and she called John for a ride every time it broke down. One day John got yet another one of those calls. “What happened this time?” he asked. “My brakes went out,” Jill said. “Can you come to get me?””Where are you?” John asked. “I’m in the drugstore,” Jill responded. “And […]

Car and train jokes

The train was about to pull ou…

7 Sep , 2009  

The train was about to pull out of the station. Swinging a large bag, a young man managed to reach the train, throw his bag in and climb aboard, gasping for air. seeking at him, another man said, “Young man, you should be in better shape! At your age, I could catch the train by […]

Car and train jokes

A man learned shortly before q…

7 Sep , 2009  

A man learned shortly before quitting time that he had to attend a meeting. He tried unsuccessfully to locate his car-pool members to let them know that he would not be leaving with them. Hastily he scribbled a message to one fellow and left it on his desk: “I have a last-minute meeting. Leave without […]

Car and train jokes

Did you ever see a country boy…

7 Sep , 2009  

Did you ever see a country boy in New York whistle for a cab? He puts two fingers in his mouth and hollers, “Taxi!”

Car and train jokes

Blake and his parents were dri…

7 Sep , 2009  

Blake and his parents were drinking at the bar in a train station when they heard a whistle. The three of them rushed out of the bar onto the platform only to discover that they had missed the train. “The next train is in one hour,” said the stationmaster. The three went back into the […]

Car and train jokes

Dilmer, six-foot-three, two hu…

7 Sep , 2009  

Dilmer, six-foot-three, two hundred eighty pounds, was thrown from his seat when the Southern Railway train he was riding derailed. The giant teenager flew a dozen feet through the air before hitting headfirst against a steel partition. For a moment Dilmer lay dazed, rubbing his head. The conductor came by and kneeled down beside him. […]

Car and train jokes

McAfee and Bracket were drivin…

7 Sep , 2009  

McAfee and Bracket were driving home after a big party. “Hey,” said McAfee, “be sure to watch out for that bridge that’s coming down the road toward us.” “What are you telling me to ‘watch out’ for?” asked Brackett. “You’re the one who’s driving!”

Car and train jokes

A San Francisco motorist follo…

7 Sep , 2009  

A San Francisco motorist following a taillight in a dense fog crashed into the car ahead of him when it stopped suddenly. “Why didn’t you let me know you were going to stop?” he yelled into the mist. “Why should I?” came a voice out of the fog. “I’m in my own garage!”

Car and train jokes

“Where’s the car?” asked Profe…

7 Sep , 2009  

“Where’s the car?” asked Professor Delbert’s wife when he got home. “Did I take it out?” “Yes, you drove it to school this morning.” “I suppose you’re right, my dear. I remember now that after I got out, I turned to thank the man who gave me a lift and wondered where he’d gone.”