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A man went in to the bank and asked to see the man who arranged the loans. ‘I’m sorry, sir,’ said a cashier, ‘the loan arranger is out to lunch.’ ‘Can I speak to Tonto, then?’ asked the man.
Dad, did you manage to fix my toy? No, it’s not broken, the battery’s flat. Well, what shape should it be?
Did you hear about the man who jumped in the Hudson River? He committed sewercide.
It was so hot when we went on holiday last year that we had to take turns sitting in each other’s shadow.
Clown: Why are you wearing such a large shirt?Second Clown: I always perform in the big top.
Q: How many Mafia hitmen does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Three. One to screw it in, one to watch, and one to shoot the witness.
Mother: Fred, why did you put a slug in your grandma’s bed? Fred: Because I couldn’t find a snake.
My mother-in-law has got so many double chins it looks like she is peering over a pile of pancakes.
After a visit to the circus, Geoff and Don were discussing the thrills and marvels they had seen. “I didn’t think much of the knife thrower, did you?” said Geoff. “I thought he was great!” enthused Don. “Well, I didn’t,” said Geoff. “He kept throwing those knives at that soppy girl but he didn’t hit […]
Did you hear about the ghoul’s favorite hotel? It had running rot and mould in every room.
