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A caller, perplexed that his new desktop computer–the one that was supposed to do everything short of bringing on world peace – was doing nothing, cried out for help. No problem, the IBM technician said. First, open a “window” to launch a specific program. The conversation continued, and the caller asked a few moments later […]
After a caller gave a technician her PC’s serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, “I see you have an Aptiva” desktop unit. Before he could say another word, the caller shrieked and said she’d be right back. When the customer returned, the technician asked if she was all right. The […]
There are three engineers in a car; an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and trying to trace […]
“This little computer,” said the sales clerk, “will do half of your job for you.” Studying the machine, the senior VP said, “Fine, I’ll take two.”
Five cannibals get appointed as programmers in an IT company.During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: “You’re all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don’t trouble the other employees.”The cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees.Four […]
Q: How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: 1.99904274017, but that’s close enough for non-technical people.
Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium PC with a research grant? A: A mad scientist.
Q: What’s another name for the “Intel Inside” sticker they put on Pentiums? A: The warning label.
Q: What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium? A: Successive approximations.
Q: Complete the following word analogy: Add is to Subtract as Multiply is to: 1) Divide 2) ROUND 3) RANDOM 4) On a Pentium, all of the above A: Number 4.
Q: What algorithm did Intel use in the Pentium’s floating point divider? A: “Life is like a box of chocolates…” (Source: F. Gump of Intel)
Q: Why didn’t Intel call the Pentium the 586?A: Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.
