Funny Lawyer jokes

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Lawyer jokes

Q. Why is it that many lawyers…

18 Oct , 2011  

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?A. From chasing parked ambulances.

Lawyer jokes

“How can I ever thank you?” gu…

18 Oct , 2011  

“How can I ever thank you?” gushed a woman to her lawyer, after he had solved her legal troubles. “My dear woman,” lawyer replied, “Ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that easy question.”

Lawyer jokes

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bi…

18 Oct , 2011  

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don’t you swerve to hit him?A: It might be your bicycle.

Lawyer jokes

Why didn’t Cupid shoot his arr…

18 Oct , 2011  

Why didn’t Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer’s heart? Because even Cupid can’t hit a target that small!

Lawyer jokes

What kind of clothes do lawyer…

18 Oct , 2011  

What kind of clothes do lawyers wear?Lawsuits.

Lawyer jokes

Where is the best place to hid…

18 Oct , 2011  

Where is the best place to hide a lawyer?In a brief case.

Lawyer jokes

A Frenchman, an Englishman, an…

18 Oct , 2011  

A Frenchman, an Englishman, an American man, and a lawyer were sitting on a train. The Frenchman offered everyone some of his baguette, then threw it out the window, saying, “Don’t worry – we have plenty of those where I come from.” The Englishman offered everyone a crumpet, then threw the rest out of the […]

Lawyer jokes

At a convention of biological …

18 Oct , 2011  

At a convention of biological scientists one researcher remarks to another: “Did you know that in our lab we have switched from mice to lawyers for our experiments?” “Really?” the other replied, “Why did you switch?” “Well, for four very good reasons. First we found that lawyers are far more plentiful, second, the lab assistants […]

Lawyer jokes

A judge in a small city was he…

18 Oct , 2011  

A judge in a small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendant, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under the influence, demanded a jury trial. It was nearly 4:30 p.m. and getting a jury would take time, so the judge called a recess and went out in the hall […]

Lawyer jokes

Lawyer: “Now that you have bee…

18 Oct , 2011  

Lawyer: “Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?”Client: “After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning, I’m beginning to think I didn’t.”

Lawyer jokes

What do lawyers do after they …

18 Oct , 2011  

What do lawyers do after they die?They lie still.

Lawyer jokes

Why don’t lawyers enjoy playin…

18 Oct , 2011  

Why don’t lawyers enjoy playing golf?Because it’s too much like work, what with all of the lying involved.