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Two cab drivers met.”Hey,” asked one, “what’s the idea of painting one side of your cab red and the other side blue?””Well,” the other responded, “when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other.”
A driver pulled up beside a rundown farmhouse. He got out and knocked at the door. A very old woman answered the door, and he asked her for directions to Des Moines.”Don’t know,” the woman said.He got back in his car and pulled away. Then he heard voices. He looked in his rearview mirror and […]
WIFE: “There’s trouble with the car. It has water in the carburettor.”HUSBAND: “Water in the carburettor? That’s ridiculous.”WIFE: “I tell you the car has water in the carburettor.”HUSBAND: “You don’t even know what a carburettor is. I’ll check it out.Where’s the car?”WIFE: “In the pool.”
A man is driving down the road for a long period of time. During his travel, he sees a priest with a gas can hitch hiking, so he gladly picks him up he says,”Normally father, i dont pick up hitchhikers. You seem like a man of dignity so i thought id make an exception.In fact […]
A young bloke has started work on a property, and the boss sends him up the back paddocks to do some fencing work, but come evening he’s half an hour late. The boss gets on the CB radio to check if he’s all right.”I’ve got a problem, Boss. I’m stuck ‘ere. I’ve hit a pig!””Ah […]
A state trooper pulled a car over and told the man drivingthat he was going 50 mph in a 40 mph zone.”I was only going 40!” the driver protested.”Not according to my radar,” the trooper said.”Yes, I was!” the man shouted back.”No you weren’t!” the trooper said.With that, the man’s wife leaned toward the window […]
A guy driving a truck in the middle of nowhere picks up a hitch-hiker.It gets dark and the hitch-hiker falls asleep. Suddenly bang, and thehitch-hiker wakes up,”what the hell was that?”. The truck driverreplies, “some kinda animal, go back to sleep.”Further the same thing again, bang, “What the hell was that?”,”some kinda animal again.”Further into […]
A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road.A woman was driving down the same road. As they passed each other, the woman leaned out thewindow and yelled, “Pig!” The man immediately leaned out his window and replied,”Moron!” They continue on their way and as the man rounded thenext corner, he crashes into […]
A driver, obviously drunk, was heading the wrong way downa one-way street when a policeman pulled him over. “Didn’tyou see the arrow, buddy?” he asked.”An arrow?” the confused driver said. “I didn’t even see theIndians
A Lutheran minister is driving down to New York to see the radio show and he’s stopped in Connecticut for speeding. The state trooper smells alcohol on his breath and then he sees an empty wine bottle on the floor, and he says, “Sir, have you been drinking?”And the minister says, “Just water.”The sheriff says, […]
a quadruple amputee is waiting at the bus stop.The bus pulls up.Driver says”alright John, how you getting on today?”
A tourist is picked up by a cabbie in New York on a dark night. The passenger taps the driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screams, loses control of the car, nearly hits a bus, drives up on the sidewalk, and stops inches from a shop window. For a second everything […]
