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What did the big, hairy monster do when he lost a hand? He went to the second-hand shop.
Did you hear about the monster who lost all his hair in the war? He lost it in a hair raid.
What makes an ideal present for a monster? Five pairs of gloves one for each hand.
How can you tell if a monster has a glass eye? Because it comes out in conversation
Boy: Did you know you can get fur from a three headed mountain monster? Girl: Really? What kind of fur? Boy: As fur away as possible!
What should you call a polite, friendly, kind, good looking monster? A failure.
How do you communicate with the Loch Ness Monster at 20,000 fathoms?Drop him a line.
What do you get if you cross a plum with a man eating monster?A purple people eater.
Did you hear about the monster who had twelve arms and no legs? He was all fingers and thumbs.
HWhy did the monster lie on his back? To trip up low-flying aircraft.
First monster: I have a hunch. Second monster: I thought you were a funny shape.
