Once upon a time there was a little girl who wanted a kitten for Christmas. Her mother couldn’t buy a kitten and parcel it up for Christmas Day, so she bought it a week before Christmas and gave it to the little girl. ‘You’re getting your Christmas present a week early this year,’ her mother […]

What was wrong with the boy’s brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas? Forty feet of track – all straight!

How does Santa Claus take pictures? With his North Pole-aroid.

Why was Santa’s little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.

What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has NO EL.

What does Santa say when he is sick? OH OH NO!

Which of Santa’s reindeers needs to mind his manners the most? “Rude”olph

What is the cow’s holiday greeting? Mooooory Christmas!

Who sings “Love me tender”, and makes Christmas toys? Santa’s little Elvis.

ELF NO. 1: What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve? ELF NO. 2: Okay everyone, sack time!!

How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas? Fleece Navidad!

What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus? Crisp Cringle.