Customer: Waiter, there’s a button in my salad.Waiter: It must have come off while the salad was dressing.
Patron: Hey, there’s a fly in my soup!Waiter: Why are you complaining? Isn’t it cooked?
I say waiter, there’s a fly in my soup! Well throw him a doughnut – they make fantastic life belts!
Customer: Waiter, this food is repeating on me.Waiter: Good, we love repeat business.
Patron: How come this fly is swimming in my soup?Waiter: I gave you too much. It should be wading.
Waiter, waiter, this lobster’s only got one claw. It must have been in a fight, sir. Then bring me the winner.
Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup?Waiter: Probably learning to read.
Waiter: These are the best eggs we’ve had for years.Diner: Well, bring me some you haven’t had around for that long.
How many waiters does it take to change a light bulb?None, a burned out bulb can’t catch a waiter’s eye.
Customer: Give me a hot dog.Waiter: With pleasure.Customer: No, with mustard.
Waiter, I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.I’m sorry, sir, but we’re out of cream. How about with no milk?
