Where did vampires go to first in America? New-fang-land.

What kind of medicine does Dracula take for a cold? Coffin medicine.

What is the American national day for vampires?Fangsgiving Day.

What happened when a doctor crossed a parrot with a vampire? It bit his neck, sucked his blood and said, “Who’s a pretty boy then?”

How do vampires keep their breath smelling nice? They use extractor fangs.

Why does Dracula have no friends?Because he’s a pain in the neck.

How does a vampire get through life with only one fang? He has to grin and bare it.

How does Dracula like to have his food served? In bite-sized pieces.

What has webbed feet and fangs? Count Quackula.

What do you get if you cross Dracula with AI Capone? A fangster.

Doctor, doctor, I think I’ve been bitten by a vampire. Drink this glass of water. Will it make me better? No, but I’ll be able to see if your neck leaks.

Did you hear about the vampire who died of a broken heart?He had loved in vein.