Manager: I’ll give you fifty pounds a week to start with and a hundred pounds a week in a year’s time?Young player: OK, I’ll come back in a year’s time!
Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom?Captain: Well, it could have been worse.Manager: How?Captain: There could have been more teams in the league!
What did the footballer say when he accidentally burped during a game?Sorry, it was a freak hic!
Why are football grounds odd?Because you can sit in the stands but can’t stand in the sits!
What do you get if you drop a piano on a team’s defence?A flat back four!
What part of a football ground is never the same?The changing rooms!
What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded?Bring on their subs!
Our team is doing so badly that “Manager of the Month” isn’t an award.It’s an appointment!
Did you hear about the football team who ate too much pudding?They got jellygated!
