Teacher: When you yawn, your supposed to put your hand to your mouth!Pupil: What?, and get bitten!
Teacher: You missed school yesterday didn’t you?Pupil: Not very much!
An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I left it in my shirt and my mother put it in the washing machine
Son: I can’t go to school today. Father: Why not?Son: I don’t feel wellTeacher: Where don’t you feel well?Son: In school!
Teacher: I’ll call you Fred Smith then.Pupil: My dad won’t like that.Teacher: Why is that?Pupil: He doesn’t like people taking the Mickey out of my name!
I failed every subject except for algebra.How did you keep from failing that?I didn’t take algebra!
Teacher: Are you good at math?Pupil: Yes and noTeacher: What do you mean?Pupil: Yes, I’m no good at math!
Teacher: Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river?Pupil: Because it has four eyes and can’t see!
Teacher: You’re new here aren’t you, what’s your name?Pupil: Fred Mickey Smith
Pupil (on phone) : My son has a bad cold and won’t be able to come to school today.School Secretary: Who is this?Pupil: This is my father speaking!
Father: I hear you skipped school to play footballSon: No I didn’t, and I have the fish to prove it!
