Funny Police jokes

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Police jokes

Police Chief: Why did you tie …

5 Jan , 2014  

Police Chief: Why did you tie a rope on that criminal?Officer: You ordered me to get a line on the suspect.

Police jokes

Police Chief: Why do you spend…

5 Jan , 2014  

Police Chief: Why do you spend all your time trying to hit flies?Officer: You assigned me to the swat team, didn’t you?

Police jokes

Veronica was practicing the pi…

5 Jan , 2014  

Veronica was practicing the piano when suddenly there was a loud pounding on the front door. She opened it and found a breathless cop. “What’s the matter?!” she asked. “Where’s the body?!” demanded the officer. “What are you talking about?” “We just got a tip that some guy named Mozart was being murdered in this […]

Police jokes

Why do Iraqi police officers w…

5 Jan , 2014  

Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes? The first knows how to read, the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

Police jokes

A man leaves a bar, gets into …

5 Jan , 2014  

A man leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away. 200 yards further he’s stopped by a police officer. Officer: “Good evening sir. We’re testing drivers for drunken driving. Would you please blow into this machine?”. Man: “I’m sorry, I can’t do that. I have asthma. If I blow on that machine I […]

Police jokes

Lady:(standing in the middle o…

5 Jan , 2014  

Lady:(standing in the middle of a busy street) Officer, can you tell me how to get to the Hospital?Officer: Just stand where you are!!!

Police jokes

“I’ll have to report you, sir,…

5 Jan , 2014  

“I’ll have to report you, sir,” said the traffic cop to the speeding driver. “You were doing 85 miles an hour.” “Nonsense, officer,” declared the driver. “I’ve only been in the car for ten minutes.”

Police jokes

How can you tell if you are lo…

5 Jan , 2014  

How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow-worm? He has a flashing light.

Police jokes

Woman: Officer you must help. …

5 Jan , 2014  

Woman: Officer you must help. I’ve just lost my wig. Police officer: Certainly, ma’am, we’ll comb the area.

Police jokes

Cop: Why didn’t you stop when …

5 Jan , 2014  

Cop: Why didn’t you stop when I shouted at you back there?Motorist: I thought you were saying “Good morning, Mr. Mayor.”Cop: Right. I wanted to warn you about going too fast through the next town.

Police jokes

Motorist: Why are you crying a…

5 Jan , 2014  

Motorist: Why are you crying after giving me that ticket?Policeman: It was a moving violation.

Police jokes

Police Chief: Why are you putt…

5 Jan , 2014  

Police Chief: Why are you putting handcuffs on that building?Officer: I’m making a house arrest