FIRST HUMAN BOY: I can lift a monster with one hand. SECOND HUMAN BOY: Bet you can’t! FIRST HUMAN BOY: Find me a monster with one hand and I’ll prove it.
What do you get if you cross a bird with a monstrous snarl?A budgerigrrrrr!
What’s big and hairy and goes ‘beep beep’?A monster in a traffic jam.
How can you tell if a monster has a glass eye?When it comes out in conversation.
An enormous monster with eight arms and eleven legs walked into a tailors shop. ‘Quick!’ shouted the tailor to his assistant. ‘Hide the “Free Alterations” sign!’
‘Here’s a good book,’ said the sales assistant in the book shop to Mrs Monster. ‘How To Help Your Husband Get Ahead.”No, thank you,’ said Mrs Monster. ‘My husband’s got two heads already. . .’
A very tall monster with several arms and legs, all of different lengths, went into a tailor’s shop.’I’d like to see a suit that will fit me,’ he told the tailor.’So would I, sir,’ said the tailor. ‘So would I.’
What’s big and ugly and drinks out of the wrong side of the glass?A monster trying to get rid of hiccups.
Why did the monster dye her hair yellow?To see if blondes have more fun.
