A woman reported the disappearance of her husband to the police. The officer looked at the guy’s photograph, questioned her, and then asked if she wanted to give her husband any message if they found him.”Yes, please” she replied. “Tell him Mother didn’t come after all.”

Mother-in-law: I baked two kinds of cookies today. Would you like to takeyour pick?Son-in-law: No thanks. I’ll just use the hammer.

One day a wife complained, “This wall clock almost killed my mother today.It fell only seconds after she got up from the couch.”The husband grunted and replied, “The darn clock always was slow.”

I used to not get on with my mother-in-law, but over the last few months I’ve developed quite an attachment for her.It goes over her head and a strap comes down under her chin to keep her mouth shut!

Q. Is it possible to kill a mother-in-law with newspaper?A. Yes, if you wrap an iron in it.

My mother-in-law was bitten by a dog yesterday.How is she now ?She’s fine. But, the dog died.

My mother-in-law is like a fine French Impressionist painting.She’s very lovely, but is best appreciated at a distance.

Steve, Bob and Jeff are all working on some very high scaffolding. Suddenly, Steve falls off and is killed instantly. After the ambulance leaves with Steve’s body, Bob and Jeff realise they’ll have to inform his wife. Bob says he’s good with this sort of sensitive stuff, so he volunteers to do it. After two […]

There was an engineer who had an exceptional gift for fixing all things mechanical. After serving his company loyally for over 30 years, he happily retired. Several years later the company contacted him regarding a seemingly impossible problem they were having with one of their multi-million dollar machines. They had tried everything and everyone else […]

A girl walked over to her neighbor’s for her morning chat session. When she got there, her neighbor remarked how tired she looked. “Yeah” she said, “I didn’t sleep well last night, I had this really strange dream.” “Do tell” said her neighbor, pouring the coffee. “Well, I dreamed I woke up and went downstairs […]

Three friends were stranded on a desert island. After several weeks with no food and no drinking water, they were beginning to lose heart. Suddenly, a bottle floated into the shore and a beautiful genie popped out. She said “I have three wishes to grant. Each of you gentleman can make one wish come true.” […]

Once there was a millionaire who had a collection of live alligators. He kept them in a pool at the back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, he decides to throw a huge party. During the party he announces, “My dear guests, I have a proposition […]