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Jeb and Eudell, University of Michigan athletes, were driving from Ann Arbor to Cleveland. Just outside the city limits they saw a sign: “CLEAN REST ROOMS.” By the time they got to Cleveland, they’d cleaned 147 Johns.
Did you hear about the UCLA track star who won a gold medal? He was so proud of it that he had it bronzed.
“Did you hear? Lament’s gettin’ a Ph.D.””What does Ph.D. stand for?” “in his case, Pin-headed Dope.”
Why did the Oregon State psychology major climb up the chain link fence? To see what was on the other side.
What is a Furman freshman doing when he grasps at thin air? Collecting his thoughts.
How do you get a Texas Tech senior’s eyes to sparkle? Shine a flashlight in his ears.
What do you call ten Utah State law students standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel.
How many Wake Forest fraternity brothers does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? Seventeen. One to do it and sixteen to shell the M&M’s.
Did you hear about the Penn State professor who went around in a revolving door for six hours because he couldn’t remember whether he was going in or coming out?
Did you hear about the Western Kentucky professor who kissed the door goodbye and slammed his wife as he went by?
And then there was the UCLA professor who opened up his vest, pulled out his tie and wet his pants.