Teacher: I’d like a room, please. Hotel Receptionist: Single, Sir? Teacher: Yes, but I am engaged.
A huge American car screeched to a halt in a sleepy English village, and the driver called out to a local inhabitant, “Say, am I on the right road for Shakespeare’s birthplace?” “Ay, straight on, sir,” said the rustic, “but no need to hurry. He’s dead.”
What did the teacher say after spending thousands in the expensive hotel? I’m sorry to leave, now that I’ve almost bought the place.
An American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following a day of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, “What is that you just served?”The waiter replied, ” Ah […]
A Jewish couple, are sitting together on an airplane flying to the Far East. Over the public address system, the Captain announces: “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Ourengines have ceased functioning, and this plane will be going down momentarily. Luckily, I see an island below us that should […]
An American tourist is visiting China. After visiting all the tourist attractions he decides to inquire about the people and askes his guide:”How large is the population here?””Around 1.5 billion” — the guide answersAmerican, After a short pause: “So, what else do you do here?”
What steps should you take if you see a dangerous animal on your travels? Very large ones.
Mrs Jones: Now, remember, children, travel is very good for you. It broadens the mind. Betty, muttering: If you’re anything to go by, that’s not all it broadens!
Helpful advice for travellers:If you are going to get on a commercial flight, take a bomb with you.BECAUSE: What are the odds of TWO guys being on the SAME PLANE at the SAME TIME with a bomb?
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower. In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says, “I’m […]
