Father: How do you like going to school?Son: The going bit is fine, as is the coming home bit too, but I’m not too keen on the time in-between!

Teacher: What’s 2 and 2?Pupil: 4Teacher: That’s good.Pupil: Good?, that’s perfect!

Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is?Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss!

Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour?Pupil: Because it can’t sit down!

Teacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren’t the best teacher in the school

Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4?Pupil: That’s not fair!You answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!