Doctor, doctor, I keep trying to get into fights.And how long have you had this complaint?Who wants to know?

Doctor, doctor, I can’t concentrate, one minute I’m ok, and the next minute, I’m blank!And how long have you had this complaint?What complaint?

Doctor, doctor, I feel so short!No problem. Hop up on the couch.

Doctor, doctor, I feel like a small bucket.You do look a little pail.

Doctor, doctor, I’ve only got 59 seconds to live.Wait a minute please.

Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears.Don’t answer!

Doctor, doctor, nobody understands me.What do you mean by that?

Doctor, doctor, No one believes a word I say.Tell me the truth now, what’s your REAL problem?

Doctor, doctor, people keep telling me I’m ugly!Lay on the couch, face down.

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a spoon.Sit there and don’t stir.

Doctor, doctor, people tell me I’m a wheelbarrow.Don’t let people push you around.

One behaviorist to another after lovemaking: “Darling, that was wonderful for you. How was it for me?”