A woman was in court charged with wounding her husband. “But why did you stab him over a hundred times?” asked the judge. “Oh, your Honor,” replied the defendant, “I didn’t know how to switch off the electric carving knife.”
Young Actor: Dad, guess what? I’ve just got my first part in a play. I play the part of a man who’s been married for 30 years. Father: Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day you’ll get a speaking part.
Marriage is a three-ring circus: Engagement ring… Wedding ring… Suffering!!!
Why is a bride always out of luck on her wedding day?Because she never marries the best man.
At a jury trial with the jury consisting of 8 men and 4 women:Defendant: “Your Honor, I wish to change my plea.”Judge: “Is someone using undue influence to prompt you to change your mind?”Defendant: “No sir, when I pleaded Not Guilty I didn’t know there would be women on the jury. Since I can’t even […]
What’s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irishfuneral?One less drunk.
What happened at the cannibal’s wedding party? They toasted the bride and groom.
Two men were remembering their wedding days. “It was dreadful,” said Fred. “I got the most terrible fright.” “What happened?” asked Harry.”I married her,” replied Fred.
Today is my twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. Really?Yes, I’ve been married twenty-five times!
The child was a typical four-year-old girl – cute, inquisitive, brightas a new penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the conceptof marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the bride arriving at the church, the entrance, the wedding […]
Two men were changing in the locker room after a game of tennis. One notices the other one is putting on pair of stockings and suspenders.He says “When did you start wearing them?” To which the other man replies “Since my wife found a pair on the back seat of the car.”
