If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps everyone away.

Dad, do you like baked apples? Yes son, why? The orchard’s on fire.

What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab apple !

The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

Two boys were eating a snack lunch in the school yard. One had an apple and the other said, “Watch out for worms won’t you!” The first one replied, “Why should I? They can watch out for themselves.”

How do you get the most apples at Halloween? Take a snorkel.

The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once a woman began screaming. “You’ve got to help me! There’s a giant gray thing in my yard, and it’s pulling apples off the tree with its tail!” “What’s he doing with the apples?” the sergeant asked. “If I told you,” the woman cried, “you wouldn’t believe […]

First apple: You look down in the dumps. What’s eating you? Second apple: Worms, I think.

What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm !

Why didn’t the two worms go into Noah’s ark in an apple?Because everyone had to go in pairs !

What did one maggot say to the other who was stuck in an apple? Worm your way out of that one, then!