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Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, “Watson, look up. What do you see? “Well, I see thousands of stars.” “And what does that mean to you?” “Well, I guess it means we will […]
Big Louie the Torpedo was becoming increasingly curious about one of the newer members of his mob, Benny the Rod. Benny had been in the business for many years in another part of the country. During that time he had garnered quite a reputation for being the most conscientious and honorable hit man available. He […]
An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him.He decided to try to break the news to a […]
Two guys are out hunting deer. The first guy says, “Did you see that?””No,” the second guy says.”Well, a bald eagle just flew overhead,” the first guy says.”Oh,” says the second guy.A couple of minutes later, The first guy says, “Did you see that?””See what?” the second guy asks.”Are you blind? There was a big, […]
Two hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north for elk hunting. They were quite successful in their venture and bagged six big bucks. The pilot came back, as arranged, to pick them up. They started loading their gear into the plane, including the six elk. But the pilot objected and he […]
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. Ibn the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, “when did you bag him?” The host said, “that was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife.” “What’s he stuffed with,” asked the visiting hunter. “My wife.”
Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty […]
Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on the roof, laying tile, when a sudden gust of wind came and knocked down their ladder. “I have an idea,” said Mike. “We’ll throw you down, and then you can pick up the ladder.” “What, do you think I’m stupid? I have an idea. I’ll shine my […]
Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, “Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?” “I don’t know,” responded the other. “I’ll ask him.”So he climbed out of the hole and […]
I saw a pen in a store the other day. I picked it up and took a look at itcause it was prettier than most.The clerk said, “It’s made in Germany”.I said, “That’s too bad, I can’t use it then”.The clerk said, “What’s the matter? You don’t like German pens?”I said, “No. I just never […]
Did you hear about the hillbilly who went into the hardware store tobuy a chain saw ?He said I want one that will cut down at least 10 trees a day.He was back at the hardware store with the saw a couple days latercomplaining that it onlycut one tree and that took all day.The clerk […]
She’s so stupid she thinks a shoplifter is a very strong person who goes round picking up shops.
