Funny Zoo jokes

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Zoo jokes

My wife asked me to take her t…

3 May , 2016  

My wife asked me to take her to the zoo the other day. I said, “If you want people to see you they can come here and do it!”

Zoo jokes

Zoo visitor: What’s the new ba…

3 May , 2016  

Zoo visitor: What’s the new baby hippo’s name? Hippopotamus keeper: I don’t know, he won’t tell me.

Zoo jokes

“Hey, Pop,” pleaded Angelo, “c…

3 May , 2016  

“Hey, Pop,” pleaded Angelo, “can I go to the zoo to see the monkeys?” “What’s the matter with you?” asked his father. “Why would you wanna go see the monkeys when your Aunt Maud is here?”

Zoo jokes

Sauer and Tolbert went to the …

3 May , 2016  

Sauer and Tolbert went to the zoo and watched in awe as a lion let loose with a spine-tingling roar. “Let’s get out of here!” said Sauer. “Go on, if’n you want to,” said the other redneck. “But Ah’m stayin’ for the whole movie!”

Zoo jokes

An enterprising mayor of the c…

3 May , 2016  

An enterprising mayor of the city of Granby, Quebec, a community south of Montreal, established a municipal zoo that has become a significant tourist attraction. It has also given rise to many unusual events. Last September one of the star attractions, Arnold, an Indonesian ape, escaped to the dismay of the zoo director. The matter […]

Zoo jokes

Two young nuns having just bee…

3 May , 2016  

Two young nuns having just been ordained were on a holiday in New York City and were standing in front of the gorilla cage at the Bronx Zoo. The gorilla took one look at this beautiful young nun, bent the bars, lept to the ground and kissed her. Then he went back into his cage, […]

Zoo jokes

Caller: Finally! I got through…

3 May , 2016  

Caller: Finally! I got through! I’ve been trying to call the zoo for hours! Zookeeper: Yes, all our lions were busy!

Zoo jokes

A Scotsman paying his first vi…

3 May , 2016  

A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages”An’ whut animal would that be ?” he asked the keeper.”Thats a moose from Canada”, came the reply.”A moose !!”, exclaimed the Scotsman. “Hoots, mon, if that’s a moose then they must ha’ rats the size of elephants over there !”

Zoo jokes

What did the Hollywood produce…

3 May , 2016  

What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film?Stop playing it cagey!

Zoo jokes

When an ape visits his tailor,…

3 May , 2016  

When an ape visits his tailor, what kind of a suit does he order?A zoo-t suit!

Zoo jokes

FRED: Did I ever tell you abou…

3 May , 2016  

FRED: Did I ever tell you about the time I came face to face with a very fierce gorilla?BERT: No, what happened?FRED: Well, I stood there, without a gun . . . The gorilla looked at me and snarled and roared and beat his chest. Then it came closer and closer . . .BERT: What […]

Zoo jokes

Fred’s class was taken to the …

3 May , 2016  

Fred’s class was taken to the Natural History Museum in New York. “Did you enjoy yourself?” asked her mother when she got home. “Oh, yes,” replied Fred. “But it was funny going to a dead zoo.”