Why did Captain Kirk go into the ladies toilet ? To boldly go where no man has been before !

What do you get if you cross a dog and a film studio ?Collie-wood !

What do you call a fight between film actors ?Star wars !

What sort of animals make the best TV presenters ?Gnus – readers !

What is an Actor? A man who tries to be everything but himself

What kind of star wears sunglasses?A movie star.

Why can’t anyone stay angry long with an actress?Because she always makes up.

Producer: Would you call your leading lady ugly?Director: Let’s just say she’d look better on radio than on TV.

Q: How many movie directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just one, but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he’s done everyone thinks that his last lightbulb was much better.

Fred: I met a really conceited actor the other day.Harry: Why do you say he’s conceited?Fred: Well, every time there was a thunderclap during the storm, he went to the window and took a bow.

Why do actors like snooker halls?Because that’s where they get their best cues.

Why does an actor enjoy his work so much?Because it’s all play.