Funny Aviation jokes

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Aviation jokes

I have a friend who is a pilot…

22 Jul , 2009  

I have a friend who is a pilot on a 747.I said “Hi Jack.”He shot me.

Aviation jokes

A husband suspects his wife is…

22 Jul , 2009  

A husband suspects his wife is having an affair with a pilot, but she keeps denying it–until finally the husband just knew when his wife said: “Honey, I’ve told you once, I’ve told you twice, I’ve told you niner thousand times, negative on the affair …” […]

Aviation jokes

All of these pilot and aviatio…

22 Jul , 2009  

All of these pilot and aviation jokes get me to thinking about my first skydiving instructor. During class he would always take the time to answer any of our stupid first-timer questions.One guy asked, “If our chute doesn’t open, and the reserve doesn’t open, how long do we have until we hit the ground?”Our jump […]

Aviation jokes

A small twin-prop commuter pla…

22 Jul , 2009  

A small twin-prop commuter plane was hijacked by a desperate animal rights extremist who vowed to kill one of the passengers to demonstrate his serious intentions. There were two passengers present, a microbiologist and a yeast geneticist. The hijacker gave each one two minutes to explain why they shouldn’t be killed. The microbiologist (who studied […]

Aviation jokes

An airline captain was breakin…

22 Jul , 2009  

An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the […]

Aviation jokes

A woman called and said, “I ne…

22 Jul , 2009  

A woman called and said, “I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola on one of those computer planes.” I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, “Yeah, whatever.”

Aviation jokes

As a crowded airliner is about…

22 Jul , 2009  

As a crowded airliner is about to take off, the peace is shattered by a 5-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, the boy continues to scream furiously and kick the seats around him.Suddenly, from the […]

Aviation jokes

Stewardess” “Yes, Sir?” “I wan…

22 Jul , 2009  

Stewardess” “Yes, Sir?” “I want to complain about this airline. Every time I fly, I get the same seat, I can’t see the in-flight movie and there are no windows blinds so I can’t sleep.” “Captain, shut up and land the plane.”

Aviation jokes

McNally was taking his first p…

22 Jul , 2009  

McNally was taking his first plane ride, flying over the Rocky Mountains. The stewardess handed him a piece of chewing gum. “It’s to keep your ears from popping at high altitudes,” she explains. When the plane landed McNally rushed up to her. “Miss,” he said, “I’m meetin’ me wife right away. How do I get […]

Aviation jokes

Once as Laloo was coming out o…

22 Jul , 2009  

Once as Laloo was coming out of airport, there was huge rush and the security guard told him, “Wait Please.” To which Laloo replied, “65 kgs,” and moved on.

Aviation jokes

As a Delta Air Lines jet was f…

22 Jul , 2009  

As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system.”Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump […]

Aviation jokes

After an overnight flight to m…

22 Jul , 2009  

After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me — all under age 11. Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area. A young customs official watched our entourage in […]